Two men got on the subway after work one day. They looked at each other and noticed they both had black eyes. One man looked at the other and said, "Hey man, how did you get your shiner?"

The other man responded, "Well, it was a misunderstanding. This morning I was riding the subway and there was a lady sitting beside me with these crazy looking boots on. I was going to say, 'Nice boots'. But instead I accidently said 'Nice boobs'. So she slugged me."

"Gotcha," the other man replied. "That's sorta the same way I got mine."

"Really? What happened?"

"Well. This morning I was eating breakfast with my wife and kids. I looked up from my paper to ask my wife if she could pass the OJ. But instead I accidently said, 'You ruined my life you fat bitch'."

A horse walks into a bar.......the bartender says, "why the long face?"

This baby seal walks into a club......

Two atoms bumb into each other.
"Are you okay?"
"I think I lost an electron."
"Are you sure?"
"I'm positive."

A pirate walks into a bar, and strolls up to the bar for a drink.
The bartender looks at him and says 'Did you know you have a steering wheel sticking out of your pants?"
The pirate looks at him and says "Arrrrrrrr, it's drivin me nuts!"

a man walks into psyciatrist's office wearing nothing but saran wrap underwear.

the psyciatrist says: "I can clealy see your nuts"

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive?

Because she was a woman

Art Experience

The piece Nighthawks by Edward Hopper strikes me as a lonely representation of one mans evening. The setting is a cafe with a single man sitting near the end of the counter, while in the corner is a couple enjoying coffee. The single man is centered in the image and you can also see the street that the cafe is located on and it looks baren and empty. Also there is a server who looks preoccupied with his work but not at all displeased to be doing what he is doing. Both men sitting at the bar are dressed alike in a suit and a hat, and I can't help to consider that the man with the lovely woman is a representation of what the single man could have been. The entire scene looks very realistic in every detail, but it appears almost dreamlike due to the very open feel the view provides along with the appearance that nothing else in the world is happenning but that within the cafe. It makes you feel like you've been there before.

Having read about the artist Edward Hopper and this piece I have a new awareness for what it displays. Hopper said that he painted what he saw and had a distinctly realistic style. This explains his attention to detail, and reading more into this piece it is appearent that the contrast between the empty street and well lit cafe was to give "the sensation of the interior and exterior of a building simulataneously". Although more information about the pictures subjects is not given, Hopper does say that he intentionally simplified the scene, so one must wonder why these few people are the one's he chose to keep. Even more Hopper says, "I was painting the loneliness of a large city" indicating that the lonely street was simbolic to the single man who contrasted with the couple then simultaneously contrasting the brightness of the cafe to the dark desolate street to create a circle of symbolism. It certainly is more interesting to view art with a background of knowledge to draw from.